Disappointment

Wyoming on my way to live in Seattle for what I thought might be 'til the end.

I Dreamed I was with a dance group who dressed up like Santa Claus. I thought this was good because I would fit in because of my obesity anyway. I couldn't keep up.

I dreamed I was given three choices for employment, the closest, least qualified option was to be a Tattoo Artist. I know nothing of the art, yet I found myself standing on a street corner attempting and failing at the task again and again.

I dreamed of being occupied with a distraction at home in my bedroom, yet knowing someone was standing at the door out of the corner of my eye, speechlessly watching me as I carry on with useless things, because all the words that can be said have been said to exhaustion.

I dreamed I heard someone walk toward my room from down the hall, stop short of entering, sigh then turn around and leave. I knew this time it was forever, but it wasn't just one person, it was everyone I ever knew in the form of one lumbering shadow, shrinking away in the distance, down a hallway once darkened in happy memories. Then all that remained was the glaring light through the empty doorway at the end of the hall.