The Electric Car

Once upon a time an electric car was invented. The inventor said that it was the cleanest automobile on the road because there were no emissions!

Most people thought it was fantastic and despite the extremely high cost, they went out and bought themselves electric cars.

One day, an entire neighborhood suddenly blacked out. It was the middle of summer and nobody could understand why the local powerplant was no longer capable of providing power to the city, despite expanding it's generator capacity.

Well, it turns out that electric cars draw roughly the same amount of electricity as small homes when they are charging.

Oh, and the power plant providing the electricity to charge the new electric cars, is a coal-burning power plant.

So the neighbors in the nice clean subdivision all went to the big hardware supercenter store and bought gas powered generators so they could charge their cars and still have electricity to run their home air conditioning in the summer.

The end.

The Jacob Marley back story

The classic Jacob Marley type ghost is cursed to walk the earth with all the karma baggage from life.

Do ghosts also carry with them the marks of their demise? This one appears to have some kind of horrifying disfigurement.

Karma's bad enough when you're alive, but it passes by with time, right? Doesn't karma happen and then disappear into the past?

Maybe karma walks itself down the street and ducks into an alley, then turns around and follows behind you, making sure you don't see it. Maybe it tries to catch up to you but cannot as long as you keep moving and keep breathing. Then it swallows your soul as you lie trapped in your cold grave.

This ghost seems to be overflowing with rage and frustration. He would like to reach out and squeeze the life out of everything, but he's trapped forever in his netherworld. His karma swirling about him forever taunting and torturing him.

What's your karma?

The wacky religion

There once was this religion that was formed by a group of tribal leaders a long time ago when they were having trouble with retaining power and authority over other tribe members and their families.

The group of tribal leaders called themselves "the council" and began getting together regularly and in secret so they could get their stories straight, that way, if someone from one tribe met someone from a different tribe and asked a religious question, the answer would be the same and it would astonish the two peasants into assuming that because they are from two separate tribes yet have the same answer to the very same question, that what ever the answer was must be the truth.

Well the tribal council members though it was a good thing that they could trick their followers in such as way and it really worked!

As the years went by, the tribal council made all kinds of decisions about various things that began to make people suspicious.

They claimed the world was flat. But then sailors kept sailing until they discovered the world was not flat, in fact it is round.

Then they claimed the earth was the center of the universe, but a scientist who invented a telescope presented evidence that in fact the earth went around the sun instead. He was thrown in prison.

Another time they went marauding across the countryside with torture devices and terrified the peasants with such shows as burning people at the stake or suspending them in iron cages for not holding the same belief as the wacky religion.

Still another time they proclaimed that cats were evil so most cats were killed. Then the rat population exploded and caused the black plague because there were cats to catch the rodents.

At every turn the wacky religion fought scientific progress.

The wacky religion was against birth control, then one day a scientist developed a way for infertile women to get pregnant with the help of science through a process called "in-vitro fertilization" but the wacky religion was against that too.

So, the wacky religion was against artificial insemination, but the wacky religion was also for keeping someone alive by scientific means such as a feeding tube and a breathing device.

The wacky religion was so generous to the unquestioningly faithful that they nurtured a massively impoverished segment of the population that helped the wacky religion earn even more money by tugging on everyon elses heart-strings.

I hope you're in the wacky religion, becuase you would be hard-pressed to find a job otherwise.

The end.

Exodus averted for the unwashed masses.

In August 12, 2010, the U.S. State Department issued a global travel warning. It basically went ignored by the main-stream media until the first weekend in October. It then became a news story. Joe couldn't figure out why, but on Sunday, October 3, 2010, the story became an all day periodic report on the cable news channels with 24 hour news cycles.

October seemed to be a strange time of year to be issuing a travel warning. It's a month away from most U.S. holidays and travel was lighter than usual during the period between Labor Day and Thanksgiving weekend. It's actually the ideal time to travel comfortably with little interruption by other passengers. There are more frequently available first-class seats.

It suddenly dawned on Joe that it was the beginning of the 4th fiscal quarter. As long as the public was distracted by the new terror warnings, they might not see the stock market begin its slide into the darkness from which it will never recover. The distracted unwashed masses won't clamor to get onto the same planes the bankers and businessmen were using to finally escape with everyone elses cash.

Don’t keep your eyes closed for too long.

When you fall asleep, it usually happens rather unexpectedly. When next I wake, I can't recall exactly when I fell asleep.

When you close your eyes and relax, your eyes tend to roll up slightly behind your eyelids. You can tell someone is faking being asleep if their eyes are looking forward when you open their eyelids, either that or they died suddenly.

When you close your eyes while you are awake, you have nothing to look at but the darkness inside your eyes.

Astronauts on Apollo missions reported occasionally seeing white flashes. These were small gamma ray bursts that penetrated their bodies and stimulated the receptor cells in their eyes, not through the iris of their eyes, but unfocused, through the tissue.

Lying in bed with my eyes closed at night trying to sleep, I sometimes perceive extremely faint aurora-like clouds, the kind one sees when one is standing on the ground at night, directly under an aurora borealis. From a distance, the aurora looks like curtains from space, but when you are directly beneath, as I was one summer long ago in Northern Michigan, it looks like nothing I can describe in daylight. It's so faint, however, I almost dismiss it as my imagination, but it's enough to keep me from falling asleep.

It's been years since I've sensed this phenomenon, probably because I have so much to think about lately that I can't reach that state of relaxation anymore.

The kind of energy that would cause the rods and cones of the retina to be stimulated to such a degree would need to be along the electromagnetic spectrum outside the visible light range of about 400 to 800 nanometers. For the wavelengths to trigger a non-light response in the cells, they would need to be some kind of harmonic equivalent that is carried along a lower wavelength. Or, since gamma rays are on an extremely high wavelength, there would need to be a tonal interference pattern that would bring the wavelength down to at least a partially visible range.

Extra terrestrial communication over extreme distances would require energies well beyond light-speed, plus consideration for the visual sensory organs of the creature to which one wants to communicate. One would need to know how to use the atmosphere of the creature to create the harmonic frequency changes necessary for the transmission to become visible.

Adjustments could only be made if one could see the behavioral response to the transmission by the creature. If the creatures don't perceive the signal as an overt communication, they may react with mass hysteria to what they might assume are conditions in their own environment, or in their own minds. That might be a good invasion strategy.

Occasionally, I'll close my eyes and in the darkness I'll see, or sense rather, an extremely faint image of a face, someone or something, not looking directly at me, but looking down or slightly away at something else. Some kind of face that my mind can only partially piece together from my own memories, but fragmented because the actual image, should I be able to see it for real, might be something I could never describe in nature.

If you ever see something like this when you are trying to sleep and your eyes are closed, do not let it look at you. Open your eyes if it starts to look at you.

How SAW can become a TV series

The plot is similar to every genre. Someone is forced into participating in an activity that makes its own revenge.

The logic or aim of the SAW series seems to be that the antagonist (or protagonist depending on how you look at it) gets others to do vengeance for him. In most cases, he gives his pawns choices, knowing full well that their emotions force them to make the wrong choices.

The SAW series uses machines that causes violence on humans, but the logic, or the philosophy behind the plot can be used to create other situations that don't use nearly the amount of violence in the film, and can be applied to a wider audience. There are two examples that lightly touch on the idea however; the opportunity to use the pro/antagonist in a similar vein as SAW is wasted.

White Collar is a series about a white-collar criminal who is forced into doing right by the FBI. Burn Notice is a series about a secret intelligence agent working his way back into the good graces of his former employer, forced into a vocation of A-Team and MacGyver activities.

The key ingredient is the Pay-It-Forward. The succeeding victims continue to pay-it-forward. In other words, the survivors acquire a radical philosophy of teaching, and find someone who was wronged, but secretly manipulate them into paying the method forward.

A very bizarre concept indeed.

Illinois Media, Meet Your Master

Illinois Newspapers owned by Hollinger International

60504 Fox Valley Villages, Fox Valley
Algonquin Countryside, Algonquin
Alsip/Blue Island Star, Alsip/Blue Island
Antioch Review, Antioch
Arlington Heights Post, Arlington Heights
Barrington Courier-Review, Barrington
The Batavia Sun, Batavia
The Beacon News, Aurora
The Beacon News Extra, Aurora
The Bolingbrook Sun, Bolingbrook
Buffalo Grove Countryside, Buffalo Grove
Calument City Star, Calument City
Cary-Grove Countryside, Cary-Grove
Chicago Heights Star, Chicago Heights
Chicago Sun-Times, Chicago
The Clarendon Hills Doings, Clarendon Hills
The Courier News, Elgin
Crete/University Park Star, University Park/Beecher
The Daily Southtown, Chicago
Deerfield Review, Deerfield
DesPlaines Times, DesPlaines
The Doings - Hinsdale, Hinsdale
The Doings - La Grange, La Grange
The Doings - Oak Brook, Oak Brook
The Downers Grove Sun, Downers Grove
Edgebrook Times Review, Park Ridge
Edison-Norwood Times Review, Chicago
Elk Grove Village Times, DesPlaines
Elm Leaves, Elmwood Park
The Elmhurst Doings, Elmhurst
Elmwood Park, Geneva
Evanston Review, Evanston
Forest Leaves, River Forest
The Fox Valley Shopping News, Fox Valley
Fox Valley Villages, Aurora
Frankfort/Mokena Star, Frankfort/Mokena
Franklin Park Herald Journal, Franklin Park
The Geneva Sun, Geneva
The Glen Ellyn Sun, Glen Ellyn
Glencoe News, Glencoe
Glenview Announcements, Glenview
Grayslake Review, Grayslake
Gurnee Review, Gurnee
Harlem-Foster, Norwood Park, Edison Park Times,
Harlem-Irving Times,
Harvey/Markham Star, Harvey/Markham
Hazel Crest Country Club Hills Star, Hazel Crest
The Herald News, Joliet
Highland Park News, Highland
Hoffman Estates Review, Hoffman Review
Home Guide Plus, South/Southwest Chicago
The Homer Sun, Plainfield
Homer Township Star, Homer Township
Homewood/Flossmoor Star, Homewood/Flossmoor/Glenwood
Jefferson Park/Portage Park/Belmont-Cragin Times,
Lake Forester, Lake Forest
Lake Pennysaver, Crown Point
Lake View/Avondale/Roscoe/Village N. Center Booste, Chicago
Lake Villa Review, Lake Villa
Lake Zurich Courier, Lake Zurich
Lansing/Lynwood Star, Lansing/Lynwood
Lerner Newspapers, Lincolnwood
Lerner Xtra,
Libertyville Review, Libertyville
Lincolnshire Review, Lincolnshire
The Lincoln-Way Sun, Plainfield
Lincolnwood Life, Lincolnwood
Lincolnwood Review, Lincolnwood
The Lisle Sun, Lisle
Matteson/Richton Park Star, Matteson/Richton Park
Maywood Herald , Maywood
Melrose Park Herald, Melrose Park
Morton Grove Champion, Morton Grove
Morton Grove Life, Morton Grove
Mount Prospect Times, Mount Propsect
Mundelein Review, Mundelein
The Naperville Sun, Naperville
New Lenox/Manhattan Star, New Lenox
The New Pennysaver, Chicago
The News Sun, Waukegan
The News Sun Plus, Waukegan
Niles Herald-Spectator, Niles
Niles Life, Niles
Norridge/Harwood Heights News, Norridge/Harwood Heights
Norridge/Harwood Heights Times, Norridge/Harwood Heights
Northbrook Star, Northbrook
Northlake Herald, Northlake
Oak Forest/Midlothian/Crestwood Star, Oak Lawn/Midolot
Oak Lawn Star, Oak Lawn/Midolot
Oak Leaves, Oak Park
Orland Park/Orland Hills, Orland Park
The Oswego/Montgomery Sun, Oswego/Montgomery
Palantine Countryside, Palantine
Palos Area Star, Palos Park
Park Forest Star, Park Forest / Olympia
Park Ridge Herald Advocate, Park Ridge
The Plainfield Sun, Plainfield
The Red Streak, Chicago
The Review, Villa/Lindenhurst
River Grove Messenger, River Grove
Rolling Meadows Review, Rolling Meadows
Schaumburg Review, Schaumburg
Skokie Life, Skokie
Skokie Review, Skokie
South Holland/Dolton Star, South Holland
The St. Charles Sun, St. Charles
Tinley Park Star, Tinley Park
Today’s Home Classified Source, Glenview
Today's Homes, Glenview
Vernon Hills Review, Vernon Hills
The Weekly Doings, Burr Ridge
West Edition Star -Bolingbrook/Romeoville/Joliet, Bolingbrook
West Proviso Herald, Hillside/Bellwood/Berkley
Westchester Herald, Westchester
The Western Springs Doings, Western Springs
The Wheaton Sun, Wheaton
Wheeling Countryside, Wheeling
Wicker Park/Bucktown Booster, Chicago
Wilmette Life, Wilmette
Winnetka Talk, Winnetka
Worth/Chicago Ridge Star, Worth/Chicago Ridge

Gee.. How can so many newspapers be owned by one multinational Corporation? I'm glad I don't live under that massive media umbrella that covers Chicago like a choking pall of coal smoke from the nineteenth century.

Learn about Hollinger International

The End